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Question: My name is Monica. I have been married for 16 years to my wonderful husband – I have noticed that whenever he watches porn videos that there is always the word gaping in the title, or on the dvd cover. He watches a lot of Evil Angel, Danni O and depraved creations. He likes to fuck me anally, but I always feel he gets a little disappointed when I don’t gape. I try and try and try, but with two teenage kids it’s hard to find time to practice and the prep time takes forever, and sometimes I’ll have an enema in the shower but something happen and I can’t finish the job. I don’t feel that it’s really affecting our sex life, but I’ve been reading a lot on gaping and it’s hard to work out where to actually start, or how to get a nice gaping ass. I’d love to do something nice for my husband, and I know it’s not the most conventional of gifts but we have spoken about it and I know that it is something that he is interested in achieving with me. I am a little worried about my muscles but I’ve heard that so long as your patient, then it doesn’t really affect you. Please help!
Answer: Whoa, alright. First things first, you need to be calm and patient. Anything to do with anal play, of muscle stretching takes time and patience. Look at athletes before they go on the field, they do a series of warm ups first to ensure that their muscles can take the strain of what is about to happen.
You need to do the same thing. Now I’m a little confused, so I’m going to go out on a limb here and start with the enema. I just want to point out that you don’t need to use a douche every time you’re going to practice. In fact, if you over douche you’re actually going to do more harm than good. So, especially when practicing, unless at some stage you’re going to do a bareback cock, I wouldn’t really worry about cleaning. Just focus on your diet, make sure you’re eating lots of fibre and light meals, and you really shouldn’t have a problem. Too much douching and you can place pressure on your gut because you’re also taking out the healthy bacteria which helps with the processing of food. For that reason I’m going to assume that cleanliness bothers you, and that that is inevitably going to have an impact on your relaxation. If you’re being bothered by mess, or how you feel, or the idea that you may not be clan enough, how can you be honestly relaxed enough to have anal sex, and indeed, be relaxed enough to form a gaping hole which needs relaxed muscles to achieve? Something to consider, and maybe talking with your partner and seeing how he feels in regards to mess may make you feel better about it. For example, if he says that it doesn’t bother him then it might make you worry a little less, and anything that makes you worry a little less is a good thing.
Secondly, I like hung dicks and perfectly shaped vaginas, not everyone can have one. The key to a gaping asshole, and rewarding that husband of yours, is in the muscle control, and the relaxation of your muscles. Yes, that’s right, relaxation is a key element of a gaping asshole. It’s really hard to explain so for a lack of a better explanation just bear with me. You need to use your muscles in your sphincter to allow an air flow through your ass. You kind of need to pucker out, and not necessarily push the muscles outwards, but again for lack of a better term that’s kind of what you need to do. In a way, fart out some air, without actually farting. As crass as that is, it’s probably the best way I can actually describe it. That’s the first step – you also need to create a kind of vacuum with the second sphincter. It’s easier when you’ve had a plug inserted for a few minutes before hand, but once you’re actually used to the muscle control you won’t necessarily need to use the plug.As for lubricant you need to use as slippery a stuff as possible. Oil based works well, but you’ll need to also grab a play sheet for easy clean up – preferably one geared for water sports as this will just make clean up a breeze. Or, if you’re not a fan of this, you did mention that you have teenagers, you can easily take the sheets to a motel, and pop them in a cleaning back afterwards. No problem. I’d probably lean you towards j-lube for gaping play simply because it’s so versatile and easy to use. It can be messy though, so about those sex bed sheets. . . .
The rest as you have identified, is practice. If you can’t practice or do not have time to practice then I am sorry to say it’s going to be incredibly difficult for you. The thing about the muscles is that if they’re not being used then they will lose their elasticity and go back to normal size, regardless of how stretched they are or how often you had used them. Imagine gym bodies not going to the gym for a few months and you’ll kind of get the idea. I hope this helps! Good luck, and if you can, send us some photos!
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